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Hunting
Jokes :
An
avid duck hunter was in the market for a new bird dog.
His search ended when he found a dog that could actually
walk on water to retrieve a duck. Shocked by his find,
he was sure none of his friends would ever believe him.He
decided to try to break the news to a friend of his,
the eternal pessimist who refused to be impressed with
anything. This, surely, would impress him. He invited
him to hunt with him and his new dog.As they waited
by the shore, a flock of ducks flew by. they fired,
and a duck fell. The dog responded and jumped into the
water. The dog, however, did not sink but instead walked
across the water to retrieve the bird, never getting
more than his paws wet. This continued all day long;
each time a duck fell, the dog walked across the surface
of the water to retrieve it. The pessimist watched carefully,
saw everything, but did not say a single word.On the
drive home the hunter asked his friend, "Did you
notice anything unusual about my new dog?""I
sure did," responded the pessimist. "He can''t
swim."
Two guys are out hunting deer. The first guy says, "Did
you see that?""No," the second guy says."Well,
a bald eagle just flew overhead," the first guy
says."Oh," says the second guy.A couple of
minutes later, The first guy says, "Did you see
that?""See what?" the second guy asks."Are
you blind? There was a big, black bear walking on that
hill, over there.""Oh."A few minutes
later the first guy says: "Did you see that?"By
now, the second guy is getting aggravated, so he says,
"Yes, I did!"And the first guy says: "Then
why did you step in it?"
Two hunters got a pilot to fly them into the far north
for elk hunting. They were quite successful in their
venture and bagged six big bucks. The pilot came back,
as arranged, to pick them up. They started loading their
gear into the plane, including the six elk. But the
pilot objected and he said, "The plane can only
take four of your elk; you will have to leave two behind."
They argued with him; the year before they had shot
six and the pilot had allowed them to put all aboard.
The plane was the same model and capacity. Reluctantly,
the pilot finally permitted them to put all six aboard.
But when the attempted to take off and leave the valley,
the little plane could not make it and they crashed
into the wilderness. Climbing out of the wreckage, one
hunter said to the other, "Do you know where we
are?" "I think so," replied the other
hunter. I think this is about the same place where we
landed last year!"
A hunter visited another hunter and was given a tour
of his home. Ibn the den was a stuffed lion. The visiting
hunter asked, "when did you bag him?" The
host said, "that was three years ago, when I went
hunting with my wife." "What''s he stuffed
with," asked the visiting hunter. "My wife."
Two men went bear hunting. While one stayed in the cabin,
the other went out looking for a bear. He soon found
a huge bear, shot at it but only wounded it.The enraged
bear charged toward him, he dropped his rifle and started
running for the cabin as fast as he could. He ran pretty
fast but the bear was just a little faster and gained
on him with every step. Just as he reached the open
cabin door, he tripped and fell flat.Too close behind
to stop, the bear tripped over him and went rolling
into the cabin.The man jumped up, closed the cabin door
and yelled to his friend inside, "You skin this
one while I go and get another!" |